Twisted Steel Read online

  The night before was very much a blur. I knew Nick had been at my house, and I’d told him all about my granny. I didn’t tell him everything, though.

  I didn’t tell him that my granny had passed away several days earlier, and my own mother didn’t bother to tell me until after the funeral had already taken place. I never even had the chance to pay my last respects or even say goodbye.

  I was furious that nobody had the decency to call me and let me know she was sick so that I could visit with her before it was too late. The fact that nobody called me when she died was a slap in the face to me.

  In all reality, I shouldn’t have been surprised that my family would act like that. It’s like they get a kick out of hurting me or something.

  Putting those feelings aside, I couldn’t help but wonder how I’d gotten into bed. I didn’t remember getting sleepy, much less walking myself into my bedroom. I looked around, seeing if maybe Nick was still there somewhere, but I didn’t see him, and I didn’t hear him moving about anywhere else in the apartment.

  I hadn’t been able to eat at all after hearing about my granny, and my stomach was rumbling. I still didn’t have much of an appetite but figured I better eat something. I wobbled into the kitchen, rubbing my eyes, which were still puffy from so much crying. On the kitchen table was a note from Nick.

  While I was cooking my scrambled eggs, I couldn’t get Nick off my mind. I thought about how he had insisted on coming into my apartment when I just wanted to be alone.

  I wanted to be angry at him for continually being so bull-headed, but I knew that was just the type of person he was. Besides, having him over had ended up being a good thing.

  It was nice to have someone to cry to over losing my granny. It was also nice having someone to vent to about my mother.

  Having Nick there allowed me to cry and have someone there to hold me, telling me everything was going to be okay. Having him there also let me get my anger out, which is something I have a problem with. I usually let it fester inside of me until it eventually builds up so much that I feel like I’m going to break.

  None of these things did much to ease the pain that came along with losing my granny without getting to say goodbye, but it was nice to know that someone was there for me.

  I appreciated the fact that he had been such a gentleman to me. I was in such a vulnerable place that he may have found it easy to take advantage of me. Instead, he tucked me into bed and left me a note letting me know he was there if I needed him.

  I wanted to let him know how much I appreciated the gesture, but I didn’t want to tell him over the phone. I would go over there later that day and thank him in person.

  23

  Nick

  I was sitting on my bed, looking at the pictures of Alexa that I had hung on my bedroom wall. Anytime I started to miss her, I looked at her pictures and reminded myself that I needed to be patient and hope that she would recognize how much I loved her.

  I was deciding whether or not I should go over to her apartment to check on her when I heard someone knocking on my door. I jumped a bit, not expecting to have any company. I thought about ignoring it, hoping whoever it was would go away.

  In the neighborhood I live in, it’s not uncommon for random people to knock on your door for one reason or another. After another knock, I decided to answer it.

  When I opened the door, I was at a loss for words. Alexa was standing on the other side. She looked beautiful. Once the surprise of seeing her there faded, I went into panic mode. Surely she would want to come inside.

  How was I going to explain the pictures of her that I’d hung up?

  “Hi,” Alexa said shyly, not looking like she was all that sure about being there. “Sorry for just dropping by like this. I probably should have called first.”

  “That’s ridiculous. You’re fine. How are you?”

  “I’m okay, I guess. May I come in?”

  I looked back into my apartment, freaking out inside.

  “Of course. Come on in,” I told her.

  I smiled and opened the door so she could come in. I was so nervous. My stomach was in knots, and I was scared of how she was going to react to seeing her pictures.

  I knew it probably wasn’t going to go well even though I only put them up to look at when I felt lonely. What in the hell was I thinking having them up in the first place?

  Alexa came in and started looking around. I’m not really sure what she was looking for. I don’t know that she was either. Finally, her gaze fell on my bedroom doorway. She had her back to me, so I had no way to see her reaction, but she sauntered towards the wall, standing in front of it for a minute or two.

  Eventually, she turned back towards me. She didn’t look mad or upset at all. The photos didn’t seem to have any effect on her at all.

  “Yeah, about those. I can explain that,” I began to tell her before she held up a hand to stop me.

  “Nick, don’t even worry about it. I know you’re not some crazy psycho guy. You’re the most passionate man I know. You just show it in some pretty unconventional ways. I can’t hold any of that against you. It’s just who you are. Anyway, I wanted to come by and thank you for being there for me last night.”

  “Thank me for what? You don’t have anything to thank me for. I’m just doing what I’m supposed to be doing. I don’t care what our official status is, I will always be there for you no matter what.”

  The sleep that she had gotten the night before had done her a world of good. She looked rested and didn’t seem as though she’d been crying nearly as much.

  “So what’s going on with you tonight?” Alexa asked after a couple of minutes of looking at each other, neither of us exactly sure what to say.

  “Honestly? I planned to swing by your place later to check on you, you know, to make sure you were okay after everything you were going through.”

  I was still having a hard time believing that she was there. It had been so long so since she’d been inside my apartment and all of a sudden, there she was.

  “So how are you doing?” I asked. “You doing better today?”

  Maybe it was a dumb question to ask, but I sincerely wanted to know how she was. Unfortunately, it caused her entire demeanor to change.

  I saw a wave of sadness take over her as she lowered her head to look down at the floor. I thought maybe she was about to start crying. Instead, she breathed in slowly and exhaled just as slow.

  “Yeah, I guess I’m doing okay. I’m not good by any means, but I suppose I'm doing better than yesterday,” she told me.

  I was worried about her and knew she was doing everything she could to keep her hurt and sadness to herself. I knew that she didn’t like to drink but thought maybe a drink could do her good under the circumstances.

  “Listen, I’ve got some Old Crow if you’re interested in drinking those bad feelings away. It won’t get rid of your pain forever, but it’ll do the job for the night.”

  “Old Crow? What is that?” she asked as I made my way to the cabinet, pulling the bottle out. Of course, the bottle was half-gone already. I’d already used it to try to quell the pain of losing her.

  “It’s what they call bottom shelf whiskey. Just as strong as Jack but a whole hell of a lot cheaper,” I told her.

  “Whiskey? You know I don’t drink that stuff,” she said. After a few moments of contemplation, she decided to go for it. “What the hell, why not? Pour me a glass.”

  “How about we start with a shot,” I laughed.

  “A glass, a shot, however in the hell you drink this stuff.”

  I started laughing at her which, in turn, made her start laughing as well. She was so naive about things like that, and I always found that to be so cute. I grabbed two shot glasses off the counter and filled them with the whiskey.

  Alexa sat down at my kitchen table, and I sat across from her, placing her shot on the table. She grabbed it and thought about drinking it but wasn’t really sure how to do it.

  She w
atched as I picked mine up and quickly shot it, swallowing it in a single gulp. I tried not to make any reaction even though it burned going down.

  She grabbed her shot glass and looked at it like she was already regretting telling me to pour her one. Putting it up to her mouth, she closed her eyes and quickly threw it down the hatch. The look on her face was priceless. She scrunched up her entire face and shook her head back and forth, her tongue sticking out.

  “Ugh, that may be the grossest thing I’ve ever tasted,” she said as I sat there trying not to laugh. “Pour me another.”

  I have to admit, hearing her tell me to pour her another shot surprised the hell out of me. I poured each of us another shot, and we downed them at the same time.

  For the half-hour that followed, the two of us sat around talking and laughing. She added in funny faces and hilarious noises each time she took a shot. The shots had no effect on me whatsoever.

  I’d been building up one hell of a tolerance since Alexa and I split up. She was long gone, however. It had only taken four shots, but it was clear that she had already found her limit.

  Eventually, she got up and started wandering all around my apartment. I had no idea what she was looking for, and I had a pretty good idea that she had no clue either.

  As she made her way into my bedroom, I got up from the table and took a seat on the edge of my bed. She was being hilarious, and I wanted a front-row seat to see what she was going to do next.

  She made her way over to my closet and opened the door, where she found some of the things she’d left at my place.

  “Oh my God, I’ve been looking all over for these,” she said in a very broken sentence, slurring her words as she spoke.

  She spun around in my direction, looking as though she was about to fall down. In her hand, she had the sweater and scarf that she’d left at my house. She looked down at me sitting on the bed, giving me a look that was jokingly angry.

  “So why do you have this, boy?” she asked. “Why did you keep these things?”

  “You left them here, and they were all I had left of you. I wasn’t going to get rid of them.”

  “What do you mean they were all you had left of me? All these pictures on your wall weren’t good enough for ya?” She asked as she tossed the scarf around my neck. She was being playful and giving me a hard time. “I thought this whiskey was supposed to be making me feel better,” she said after a big sigh. “I don’t believe that it’s working. It’s not making me feel better.”

  “The whiskey is just to numb the pain,” I told her. “It’ll take you some time before you actually feel better but I promise you that it’s all going to be okay.”

  It had been so long since I’d had her and I was yearning for her. I had to have her. I rested one of my hands on her back and ran it up to her shoulders.

  “Maybe I can do something to make you feel a little better,” I said as she leaned closer to me, moaning lightly as I rubbed her shoulders. “Do you want me to make you feel better?” I asked.

  “I do,” she replied as I guided her down onto the bed.

  I was happy to finally be getting the chance to be with her again. It had been so long since I’d embraced her and felt the softness of her touch.

  “I’m going to take care of you tonight,” I told you. “Just lie back on the bed and relax. I want to make you feel good,” I whispered into her ear.

  Alexa didn’t say anything. She just nodded her head and smiled. I gave her a long, deep kiss on the lips before running my lips and tongue down to her neck.

  I kissed up and down her collarbone, unbuttoning her jeans as I moved along. I continued kissing her hips as I yanked her pants off her body. My lips kissed over her panties, causing my dick to harden.

  Once I had her jeans completely pulled off of her, I tossed them to the side, watching them float to the floor before I crawled on top of her. Alexa looked beautiful lying there on the mattress. She was looking up at me.

  She didn’t say it, but I could tell that she needed me just as much as I needed her. If she could have some kind of release, she might feel just a little bit better. I wanted to make her feel better, even if it only lasted for a little while.

  I moved my hand up her thigh as Alexa slowly spread her legs apart for my touch. I laid down next to her and kissed her neck and shoulders while my fingers traced over her panties. The skin below was so soft and inviting. I couldn’t wait any longer.

  I moved the thin fabric aside, exposing her completely. I could feel the heat coming from her body. I took one of my fingers and pushed it inside of her. She was wet and ready for my touch. Using her juices, I wet my fingers and began to slowly rub her clit. She moaned, grabbing my arm.

  Before long, Alexa started to squirm and move around under my touch. It hadn’t taken her very long, and she was already about to get off. It had been so long since we’d been intimate with each other. It felt like ages since I’d been able to touch her and I’d missed it.

  “There you go, go ahead and let go. Go ahead and cum for me,” I whispered into her ear as I slid two fingers inside of her and continued rubbing her clit.

  Within seconds she was yelling out, her entire body shaking with pleasure. She arched her back, bringing her ass completely off the mattress as her orgasm overtook her.

  Once she was done, I slid my fingers out of her, causing her to moan a little more. She looked more beautiful than she’d ever looked before. I was hard as could be but I wanted that night to be all about her, so I played with her hair. She looked like she had indeed taken an edge off. She looked so relaxed.

  “Why don’t you go ahead and go to sleep. Forget about everything else until tomorrow,”

  Alexa didn’t put up any resistance. She rolled over onto her side, nuzzling her head in my chest while I pulled up a blanket and held her in my arms while she went to sleep.

  I felt like everything was finally right. It had taken a long time to get to that point, but everything was finally right again.

  24

  Alexa

  I had no clue what time it was. All I knew was that it was sometime at night because it was pitch black outside. I sat up on the bed, and my head instantly started to spin.

  Having never been drunk before, I’d never experienced a hangover. If that was what you had to look forward to when you drank, I wasn’t sure why anyone touched a sip of alcohol in the first place.

  It took me a minute to get my bearings, but I was able to look around and realize that I was still in Nick’s apartment. My head was pounding so I laid back down on the pillow and wondered what I had been thinking. I kept trying to talk myself out of going over there.

  I kept telling myself that nothing good could possibly come from going to his place. I didn’t let those little voices in my head win, however, because I felt like I owed it to him to thank him for being there for me when I needed him the most.

  Showing my gratitude was never supposed to end with me in his bed, but there I was. My inhibitions were gone as soon as the whiskey went down my throat and I allowed passion and desire to take over.

  Nick was sleeping peacefully next to me, his arm around my waist, just like we always slept. I slid my body to the side, grabbing his hand and moving it away from me.

  He moved around and said something indecipherable in his sleep, pulling his arm close to himself as he readjusted his body. It was dark, but I was able to see him using the dim light coming from the bathroom. I couldn’t help but look at his face. He was so handsome.

  I thought about how well I knew him but at the same time, didn’t really know him at all. When it came to the physical aspects of our relationship, I knew him well. I knew every single detail of his body.

  I knew what turned him on, as well as the things he didn’t like. I knew what made him laugh, and I knew what made him upset. What worried me, however, were the things that I had no clue about.

  When it came to his past, I had no idea what was true and what was made up. I had no clue who he
was when he was younger or anything about his life before I met him.

  All I knew was that he had been to prison after a bar fight got out of hand. I didn’t know what prison had been like or what kind of an effect it had on him.

  Lying there looking at him was so strange. He seemed so peaceful. Everything seemed so calm. It made me wonder how things progressed the way they did. How did we end up in such a bad spot?

  I never would have put up with any of that from any other man, but with him, it was so different. Could it be because I had never been in love with any man like I loved Nick? Could it be because I had never felt the kind of love that he had given to me? Was it really love, though? Was it real?

  It sure felt real. When we were together, he’d been so good to me. He was sweet and loving. Honestly, when the truth came out about him being in prison, he was pissed off, but he wasn’t mad at me. He never told me that I should mind my own business or anything like that.

  He was persistent when it came to getting me back. He let me know that he was there and that he still loved me. He never yelled at me or hit me when I denied his advances. Instead, he just kept making sure I knew he was around.

  A few people that I told about it said that I should have been scared of him. They told me that I should have been concerned at his persistence, but I wasn’t worried in any way. I wasn’t in fear at any time. I knew that he wouldn’t ever hurt me.

  Of course, maybe I was just being stupid. I could have made him stop coming around if I really wanted to. The truth was, somewhere deep down inside of me, I didn’t want him to stop.

  As I pondered all of these feelings, I looked down and watched him sleeping. It always amazed me how such a big, tough guy could look so angelic when he slept. All of his features when softened while he was out.

  The lines that I usually saw on his forehead weren’t visible. I took my finger and traced it lightly from his cheek down to his chest. His muscles were thick and hard, even as he slept.